Saturday, June 11, 2005

belmont bust

the 137th belmont stakes!

last year it was a day not to be remembered. er, literally. d.l. hueghly, jungle juice, mimosas at dawn, a very disappointing turn by smarty jones, brooks brothers hobnobbing with harley davidson, a broken beer pong table and a ride home in the bowels of a limousine. ah, good times.

this year, in an effort to recoup last years losses, belmont went alcohol free. even the LIRR had signs out... NO ALCH TODAY ON TRAINS TO BELMONT... scrolling across the platform. didn't stop us from hiding the champage under jackets each time the conductor went by, but it should have been an indication of the turn the day would take.

by the time we arrived at belmont, around 12:30, we'd missed the first race. we bet on the next two, won a bit, lost a bit. there was some preposterous mixing and matching of yellows and pinks, a few overly eager nautically inspired belts, and at least 3 fedoras. in our cooler citcle alone. we had triplets, high heels, adirondack chairs, and a cooler of precut subway style sandwiches. what more could one ask for?

how about not $7.50 miller lites. because that is like, totally a downer, sir. yes sir. no sir. please don't arrest our darker friends sir. and then they walked away with our beer. we thought we were being sneaky, they thought we were committing a crime. i personally thought officer simon should lay off the roids.

the beer gone, and the grain alcohol punch tasting suspiciously like kool-aid kosher for twelve year olds, the charm wore off fast. after one of us lost $105 on 7 consecutive races, and the sky opened up, it was time to head back to the LIRR. i don't know what belmont was thinking outlawing booze.

attendance was down over 30% this year. serves 'em right. we're not going back. and we'd so hoped it would be the beginning of a beautiful relationship. for shame.

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